Rock Bottom

"Wow! It's so pretty outside tonight!"

I'm giving a normal moon cycle another shot now that I can get rid of zombies and the "lunacy" moods. I'm finally figuring out everything I can do with the Retuner mod and I'm all "GET RID OF ALL THE ANNOYING BEHAVIORS!!"  It's a process.  Lorien loves the full moon. I'm not sure if it's her "Supernatural Fan" trait, or a fairy thing. Regardless, it gives her a nice little moodlet.

Anyway, last chapter Bree's relationship with her boyfriend, Nick, did not go well. He stopped answering her calls again, so she went over to his house where they woohooed to the sound of his oldest daughter giving birth to his first grandchild in the front yard.

Right afterwards Nick ran off to work, leaving Bree to deal with his two daughters and a very pissed off wife. After getting thrown out of the house by Rene, the wife, Bree confronted Nick and wanted a status update on their relationship. Turns out that Nick did not see things the way Bree did. He felt that their relationship was not much more than a series of booty calls, and he got annoyed with Bree because she had told his wife what was going on. He walked away, leaving her in the parking lot very confused. So it seems that they are over.

And Lorien became a child, obviously.

And that's what you missed on Glee.

"I know it's late and I should go to bed, but I'm so hungry!!"

"I feel funny."

Oh no.

"Huh. I'm guess I'm not eating a late dinner after all."

"What the hell? It's like, one in the morning! Some of us have to get up early for work, you know!!"

This is not my choice, BELIEVE me.

"HEY!  Welcome to the darkside ...................... whichever one you are! Don't worry, we can still eat all the food every night if we're so inclined. You can even keep stealing lollipops!"

"Uh, thanks. I guess."

"Also, way to die! Right in front of the stove! I can't wait to see this!!"

Right? Thanks Mungo.

Yavanna: "Oh come on!! It's been a whole 5 minutes already! When is that stove going to explode?"

"She's right, Mom! You should get that pan before it starts a fire."

"Sweetie, I've tried but your Grandpa is completely blocking the stove. I can't get there to grab the pan!"

Grim: "*sniff sniff* Is something burning? I mean, I appreciate the ambiance, but I don't think that's where this guy is going."

Yavanna: "Oh man, this stove is NEVER gonna go up!!"

Mungo: "No hard feelings, Grim. Let's just get this over with. There's clearly a bit of a situation going on here."

"YES!! That's what I'm talkin' about!!"

"Mmmmmm, reminds me of home.  Well, hate to reap and run but I've gotta go! I've got .......................................  a thing. Laters!!"

Asshole.

With absolutely no sign of the fire department, Bree takes matters into her own hands.

"WHAT ARE YOU DOING?? That's a perfectly good fire!!"

"Grandpa!! Come back!! You have to save us!!"

"Honey, relax. I've got this, okay?"

"The fridge is burning!!!!"

Right when Bree almost has it out.

"*sniff* Good lord it STINKS in here! Y'all need to open a window."

"So, why did I get called out here, again?"

Dead heir lineup!! Plus bonus Georgina and Otho.

BREE!!!!

"What? I almost DIED!!!"

Dignity, she no haz.

A few hours later ....................

Why is the firetruck still here?

Nobody inside. Where the hell is this woman?

"Make me come all the way out here, to a stinky house, with nothing to do, will you? Well guess what?  I'M STAYING!! That's right! I get paid by the hour and I'm gonna stay RIGHT HERE in this gross, smelly kitchen, doing NOTHING but letting the job clock tick!!!"

"MUAHAHAHAHAHAHAAAAAAAAA!!!  It's brilliant!!!"

"Except I'm hungry. Y'all got any food?"

"Man, what a long day. I'm still so exhausted from last night. I'm gonna check my messages and get a snack."

"What the...."

"It STILL stinks in here!! I TOLD you people to OPEN A DAMN WINDOW!!"

"What? Was there another fire? Why did you come back?"

She never left.

"WHAT??"

"THEY WILL PAY!!!"

Graveyard?

"Yeah. It's too sad at home without Grandpa."

Probably just as well, sad just barely scratches the surface of that looney bin.

"What are you talking about?"

Do your math.

Oh sure. Why not.

"Well, it's not some alley somewhere, so I suppose that's someth .............. oh, I should get that."

"Malcolm, this better not be you!"

"Oh! Hi Dominic! .................... Oh, really? ........ Uh ............... Gee, this is awkward. See, I'm kinda already out on a date. ........................... Malcolm.................. Yeah...................Okay, I will!  Bye!"

You bitch.

"Oh, he's not coming? Figures. *sigh* Well, I might as well see the exhibit while I'm here."

"Exquisite. Just breathtaking."

"REX!  Hi!! How are you? Funny running into you, here!"

"Hi Bree! I'm well. I had some time after work so I came by to see the new exhibits. How are things with you?"

"Oh my god guess what? I got my final promotion!! I'm a power broker!!"

"That's great, Bree! Congratulations!!"

"Thank you!!"

"SSSSHHHHHHHhhhhhhhhhhhh!  Oh my god, girl! Nick is here! He's right behind you. Just keep talking and don't turn around!!"

"Oh shit, seriously?  Okay!"

"So, with Dad gone I don't know who is going to do the cooking, now!"

"Ugh! Bree is here? Who is that guy she's talking to? I didn't know she's into cops!"

"I mean, I've been so busy with work, and hanging out with YOU, Rex, that I just don't have the time!!"

"Is he still there?"

"Shhhh, he's leaving."

"Oh thank god!!"

"How could she do this to me? How could she be seeing some other guy?"

Because you're an asshole! You used her and dumped her, remember? And you and Rene are married, AGAIN!!

"Now where am I gonna get a good woohooty call?"

Unfortunately, you massive douche, you're in luck. Bree still has no self-respect and rolled NO romantic wishes for Rex. Who's probably gay, but leaps and bounds better than your sorry ass.

"For real, Bree, stay away from Nick. He's not a nice guy. You deserve much better than him!"

"Yeah, thanks Rex. I know you're right. It's just hard! Nick is so .................. hot!!"

"Oh Bree. Be patient. The right guy is going to come along for you, I know it!"

"I hope so. He's sure taking his sweet time."

"What's up with that weird lady, Mrs. Red?  Why, I have no idea, Mr. Green! I think she's a little crazy! Is she ever going to leave? I don't know Mr. Green. She may think she lives here. What do we do, Mrs. Red? I'm not sure, but I'm thinking a swimming pool and a few walls might take care of it!"

I'm really hoping it doesn't come to that.

"I miss Grandpa!! He'd make that crazy firefighter leave!"

Actually, he'd probably be her BFF by now.

"I'm starving! Why don't I get any cake?!"

"GO HOME already, you nutjob!! Quit dicking around in our kitchen, making faces and complaining all day!!"

"DON'T YOU UNDERSTAND THAT I CAN'T!! I NEED MONEY!!"

** It was here that I quit the game. When I restarted the next day, I figured that Errortrap would catch the firefighter and reset her. It did but she wasn't gone like I expected, just unstuck.

"Man, this house is UGLY. Brick, brick,, brick. Haven't you heard of wallpaper or, I don't know, PAINT??"

"Lady, you are lucky that I am not experienced enough to play real fairy tricks on you!"

"Still here, eh?"

Yes, and quit thinking about Nick!!

"What? I'm NOT! I'm thinking about Rex ...... yeah,, Rex. He's very sweet."

He is, but your wishes give you away, Ms. Pantsonfire.

"Whatever. I'm going to bed."

"WHY IS THIS LADY SLEEPING WHEN THERE'S WORK TO BE DONE??"

"That does it! I'm really leaving now!!"

"Hmph!! No respect! That's everybody's problem! No appreciation for hard work and attention to detail! I don't even get any cake!! I tell you what, next time their home can BURN TO THE GROUND!! See if I lift one damn finger!! Ungrateful dumbbells."

And away she went, flipping the neighborhood the bird by turning on the sirens and waking everyone up as she left.

"Oh sweetie, I'm so sorry that you're missing your Grandpa so much. I really wish the little zapper worked on you."

"Most Awkward Hug Ever, Mom."

"Mom, am I ever going to get another dad? It didn't really matter before, but now that Grandpa's gone, I really want some kind of dad."

"Oh Lorien, I know. I wish Leslie was around to hang out with you. I really think you'd be good friends."

"Daddy was a fairy, too, right?"

"Oh yes, honey, he was! You look just like him. He was also light purple with bright pink wings."

"I wish he was here."

"I'm sure you do."

"But I promise I'm doing the best I can to find you another dad. In the meantime, here's a less awkward hug."

"Thanks, Mom!"

Back again?

"Don't judge me! My daughter needs a father!"

But Nick?

"Nick is a perfectly good dad! He's already got two kids .."

Three kids.

"..three kids, WHATEVER! And they're all just fine and, alive and stuff. .............. Leave me alone!"

"Bree? What are you doing here?"

"We need to talk, Nick."

"About what?"

"Us. I've been thinking ........."

"Yeah, I'm just gonna stop you right there. I've been thinking, too, and there is NO 'us', Bree. We're done. And I think it's pretty clear that we've both moved on."

"But ...."

"But nothing! You chose to rock the boat, you fell out, now go swim to shore. You're not getting back in."

"What's all the ruckus out here?"

"Nothing babe. Seriously, not one.damn.thing. Just some nobody looking for trouble."

"Ooooo, trouble!! I love it when you take charge, you sexy bastard!!"

"Yeah you do, bitch!!"

"What is going on here? What's he doing? He's not even going to talk to me?"

Oh Bree, just go home. It's over. Really over. Luckily I didn't have to lock in that woohoo wish, because you're not getting it. Go home. We'll find you someone else, someone better.

*sigh* "I have to start ALL OVER again?"

Try not to think about it. Go home and get in the hot tub.

Poor Bree. I'm really hoping she doesn't roll anymore wishes for Nick, cause this is just pitiful.

Meanwhile, over at the park.......

"Look, Ian!! Look at that!!"

"What? That pigeon?"

"Nope!! It's snowing!!"

"W..w..w..what?? W..w..what is your p..p..pro..problem, Lori??"

"My Grandpa died."

"Mine d..d..died t..t..t..too and I'm not fr..fr..freezing people!!"

Ian is noteworthy in that he is Bungo's grandson via his daughter Galadriel.

After striking out with Nick, Bree decided to go to the park where she ran into old pal, Tigger. Tigger is single now, for whatever reason, so Bree decided to chat him up to see if there's anything there. They took it to the Bistro, where we saw Eveline and Ava, her daughter with Beatrice.

"I cannot believe Tigg is here with another woman!!"

Ugh. Always gotta be drama. Get over it, Sophie! You guys are divorced. Tigger can see other people if he wants.

Evie: "She is always here with a different man every time."

And as if this wasn't bad enough.

Are you kidding me? This town is too small!

"Wait, that's not the cop? Who's this slut doing now?"

Tigger: "Bree, what's wrong? You look really freaked out."

"Oh ...... it's .. nothing. Give me a hug you ........... gorgeous thing!!"

Then Tigger ran off before he turned into a pumpkin or some such shit.

I guess you can call him tomorrow.

"Thanks for inviting me over, Bree! I have great news!"

"Oh really? Well I'd love to hear it, Tigg!"

"Sophie and I got back together!!"

"Uh ......... what?"

"Yeah! It was so weird! She called me out of the blue late last night. Said she was sorry and that she really wanted to work on our relationship. Isn't that great? Our kids will be so happy!"

"That's ........... nice, Tigger. I'm, um, really happy for you two."

"Thanks, Bree! I mean, the vows did say 'til death do you part', amirite? And nobody's dead yet! Well, my first wife, Daisy, is dead. But we're not talking about her!"

*sigh* "I am NEVER going to get married."

Oh come on, you don't mean that.

"You wanna bet?"

Of course I had to lock this one in. I don't think this is compatible with the 'get married' wish, and that one came first and is worth more points. Tell you what, Bree, we'll work on the dating wish, and should you fall in love, I'll delete it and eat the five points.

"Whatever."

We'll end this depressing shitshow here. Coming up, **spoiler alert** Bree does not get this wish. **spoiler alert** Lorien becomes a teen, and she and her mother take a fateful trip to France.

Opportunities

Points

No points won or lost this chapter. Holding steady at +288.