Meet Celebrian (Kel-Lee-Bree-Ehn), named after Galadriel's daughter, Elrond's wife, and Arwen's mother. Celebrian is an eccentric loner who is ..... purple? Um, Yavanna?
"What? She's not purple, she's red!"
I hope Santos understands the concept of fucked up game genetics.
"So honey, Celebrian is very cute, and you know I love her and you. I'm just wondering ....... well ........ she's red. No one in our family is red. I don't think anyone in Santos' family is red. Is there anything you want to tell me?"
"*sigh* Look Dad, I don't know what to tell you. Celebrian is definitely Santos' baby. I've never been with anyone else. I have no idea why she's red. Maybe it's a genetic mutation."
"If you say so, honey, you know I believe you. I just hope it doesn't create any further problems."
"Oh, there will be no further problems. You know better, don't you Santos?"
He's not even there.
"He can hear me."
No sweat.
"Come on, Celly, let's go for a little walk."
"Zzzzzzzzz have to get up soon to garden zzzzzzzzZ"
"Let's put you down riiiiight here."
"Heh heh, I love babies!"
I can't believe you're still in a towel.
"You've got something Grandma wants!!"
"Oh yeah, baby! I haven't had a lollipop in 25 years!"
Graffiti Man: *silently judges the terrible old lady*
Celly: *not at all silently judges* "MY GRANDMA SUCKS!!!!!!"
"Oh Finny, we're just the best grandparents, don't you think?"
"Oh hell yeah! Celly is lucky to have us!"
"I am definitely NOT the one feeling lucky, here."
So I had Yavanna and Santos' wedding all planned. I decided to do a location wedding at the beach, since they both love the outdoors. I even went into Edit Town and spruced that little park up for a party. As the time approached for everyone to get their asses to the beach, it occurred to me that I forgot something rather important.
"Hey Santos, want to get married?"
"REALLY?? Yes, YES!!"
"Good. Wedding's in two hours, grab a cab."
I'm such an amateur sometimes.
"I feel so pretty!"
You look beautiful, Kathy.
"I'm excited for this wedding! It's going to be so much fun!"
"Hello? Alton? Um, seriously? Fuck off, dude. Not only is it my wedding day, but I'm standing here ready to say my vows. Yeah, you're sorry alright. BYE asshole! *beep* GOD!!"
I know! The nerve of some people.
"Are you ready?"
"Almost, we have to wait for Kathy."
"Hey guys! I'm bored so I'm gonna go do my homework. You look beautiful, Yavanna!"
"Okay, screw it, let's just do this."
Nobody ever follows my wedding party plans.
It was a really lovely wedding, even if most of the guests swam or raided the buffet instead of watching the ceremony.
And their wedding photographer wasn't half bad.
Not too shabby right?
I even remembered to put a crib in a corner so Celly wouldn't have to pass out screaming on the ground. So peaceful. Almost.
"What are YOU all dressed up for? This isn't your wedding."
"I know all about you from Georgina. You're just some street urchin that Finny took in because he felt sorry for you."
"Shut UP Santos! Finrod is MY father, too, and I deserve to be a part of this family. YOU are just a mean person with a stick up your butt!"
"AND you're not worth my time."
"Such a beautiful day! I hope everyone is having fun!"
I'm sure they are, if they are not Kathy.
"Do you think anyone will drown?"
No. And you really need to let your obsession with that go, it's more than a little creepy.
In lieu of a honeymoon, Yavanna and Santos had their inaugural woohoo in the tent in the backyard.
Pitiful. Just pitiful.
"Celly."
"Grandma."
"We meet again."
"Shit."
"Someday, old woman, someday you will pay for this treachery."
"LOL! You know what they say about old age and treachery, baby girl. Right now YOU'RE going to pay. One lollipop, please."
"Baby's crying."
Thanks, Finny.
Hey! Someone who doesn't have one foot in the grave! WTG, Olo!!
Awww.
"At least one of my grandparents isn't a complete failure!"
Celly had her birthday. She has green eyes! I love it!
"At least Grandma can't steal my lollys anymore."
Oh you poor child.
"Welp, I guess I'm not putting this cake away."
Venkman!!! Move your ass!!
Still fishing. I think she has 4 or 5 perfect fish so far.
"So Santos and I are having another baby."
"That's great! Are you hoping for a boy this time?"
"Sure am!!"
"Hurry up and finish your bottle, grandchild, I have a serious sugar craving that demands satiation."
"Give it up, old lady. My Auntie is going to come and save me!"
"Aw, you're so cute, Celly!!"
"Just keep that crazy bitch away from me, okay?"
"Look kid, leave my daughter alone! I don't want bastard chicks like you even touching her!"
"Still think she's your daughter? Like she's red because she's perpetually embarrassed?"
"Sorry man, but I don't even think your equipment is functional. Even if I wanted to find out for sure, I don't have a microscope or a cast iron stomach."
Much of the toddler skilling has fallen to Finny, since Yavanna hasn't wished to do any of it.
"All Grandpa wanted to do was make mac and cheese. I still don't know how the oven caught fire."
"Fyah!!"
"Awahm!!"
It's important to pass the family legends on to the youngest generation.
"I'm so glad I ran into you, here, Brennan. I hate doing homework by myself."
"No problem! I hate doing it alone as well. By the way, do you know what they mean by 'integer'?"
"Okay, Brennan. I'm starving and really want to go to the diner with you. Can you please finish up already?"
"Sorry, Kathy! I'm going as fast as I can."
I had her "Do homework with....." Brennan and she finished over 2 hours ago and he's still plugging away with no way for me to cancel the action. Way to wreck my plans, BRENNAN.
"I swear, I'm not doing it on purpose!"
Another almost TWO HOURS later,
"Uh oh. I probably should have gone home already."
Dammit, Brennan!!
"Kathy! Do you have any idea what time it is? I was very worried about you!"
"Honest Dad, I was doing homework with my friend Brennan! It took him FOREVER to finish. I didn't want to leave him alone in the park until he was done."
"Oh. He's that slow, huh?"
"I was thisclose to finishing it for him."
"That's okay, sweetie! I was just a little worried, is all. I'm very proud of you!"
"Verrrrrrrrrrry proud."
"Uh, Dad? You may want to get that checked out. Like, go see a chiropractor."
Or a priest.
Really? Actually, I think Drew is an elder with a glitched portrait.
Next morning,
Kathy! Why aren't you in school?
"I couldn't get in the building! The door was blocked by all these kids."
Then wait your turn! Get back there, now!!
"Alright. Man, it's such a nice day."
We don't have Seasons. It's ALWAYS a nice day.
"Man, gardening kills my back! I need a massage!"
"Dammit! They threw me out! I didn't even finish my massage!! Stupid baby!"
Poor girl. Off to the hospital with you!
Meet Thingol Valinor! I was able to roll his traits, he's good and athletic. He is named after the father of Luthien, and ruler of Doriath.
He, also, did NOT change color on the way home.
"I was born perfect."
That evening Kathy invited Brennan over to
"Hi Bren!!"
"Hi! Are you okay? You look really tired!"
"Yeah, I was up way too late last night. Plus I have a brand new nephew who's kind of noisy."
"Do you want to go to bed and, maybe, I'll see you tomorrow?"
"No, there's definitely something I want to do first."
He's currently single, a rarity in my game. So I want to snatch him up before curfew or Kathy passing out.
"In that case, I'm happy to stay!"
"Oh Brennan, you're so handsome!!"
It was a breeze, almost.
"OH MY GOD!! Were you seriously just kissing my husband's bastard daughter? What the HELL is your problem? Don't you have any self-respect at all?"
"Yeah Georgie! You tell 'em!"
"Now why don't you go home and get yourself a nice girlfriend and quit chasing pathetic street urchins."
"Heh heh. My nephew just got schooled!"
Yup. Brennan is Santos' nephew. Small world.
"You can forget it, LADY! I love Kathy! She's not a bastard, or a pathetic urchin, but you're clearly a mean, heartless old bag who hangs out with my Uncle too much."
"You're clearly a simple-headed idiot who can't see what's right in front of his face."
"Don't mind me, y'all! I'm just gonna play with the xylophone. Keep doing what you're doing. No lollipops here."
They took it inside.
"So, are you at least rich?"
"........................................ Oh for crying out loud."
Okay Brennan, you ARE being a little creepy.
"She's so pretty!"
"Zzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz NO! Don't wanna learn to write!! Just ..... want......to fish zzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzZ"
It's after 11, don't you have a home to go to?
He finally left around 3 or 4am.
Next morning, Celly got her wake up call.
"Grandma needs her breakfast!"
"You just wait until I grow up, lady!! You're gonna be SORRY!!"
Look at it this way, you're her favorite grandchild!
"Until yesterday, I was her ONLY grandchild!!"
"*sigh* Can't even relax at the park without some brat, kept out too late no doubt, screaming in the background."
That's Cindy, Luthien, your granddaughter. She's here with you and needs to be fed.
"Ugh, you're right. When do I get to die?"
Soon. This is my last photo of her. She died shortly after.
Hair fall out again?
"I look like a house elf!"
I fixed it for him, again.
"I'm Kathy, I want to be a big fisherwoman when I grow up. Come on bitch, that's a fake job if I've ever heard one!! Just admit you plan on living off your father while you laze around all day doing nothing of value!"
"Santos, you are such an idiot!! I can make a lot of money, fishing! Some of the bigger fish go for hundreds of simoleons! You just want to be mean. Well screw you!"
"Move it, bitch, I need to shower."
"OH MY GOD! Victoria Goth finally got an Instagram! You know I'm following that shit."
"I said MOVE!!"
"Ahhh! You will not BELIEVE the stuff this girl posts! I hope she's not planning on ever going into politics."
"Now I'm going to stink. Are you happy now??"
"HAHAHAHAHA!!! Seriously, how many selfies can you take in a day? I think Vickie's going for some kind of record."
Just haul it across the house and use the other shower, you asshole.
We'll end it here. Next chapter, Thingol becomes a toddler, and generation two starts dropping.
Points
Heirs:
LTW Heir:
Spare/Spouse:
Children: +2 (Celebrian and Thingol)
Every $100,000:
100,000 Happiness Points (heir):
Skipped/Failed Opportunities:
Fulfilled Opportunities: +2
Deleted Locked In Wishes:
Accidental Deaths:
Social Worker Visits:
Previous Total: +100
New Total: +104
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